love me, love my dog
a friend made comments on facebook (yeah, i know) complaining about people who complain about the dog when they come over, and i like the point. we can all debate irresponsible pet ownership, but at least we should have the civility to respect a person's right to keep their own place whichever way they prefer to keep it--animals included.
in the larger sense, i've often had occasion to listen to complaints (that's what criticisms are) about some people i know by other people i know, and it's funniest because, often, they're bi-directional and comically coincident. (ever notice that your best asshole friend always thinks your other best asshole friend is an asshole friend, and vice versa?) takes one to know one, i always think to myself, and i do my best never to pile on and ratchet up the rhetoric. love me, love my friend, ya know? actually, love everyone. i think some guy a few years back tried to say something to that effect...
anyway, so it is that i find geopolitical posturing these days to be an absolute hoot. (anybody else read the wikileaks cables like scripts from an snl skit?). we wave our nuclear weapons around like the big stick they are, yet we whine incessantly whenever anybody else wants to build some of their own. other countries sail whaling fleets around the globe eradicating whole species of cetaceans while bleating about global disrespect for the environment. still others drop white phosphorous munitions on civilians while railing against the evils of terrorism. (yeah, i know, i should get off that one, but, seriously, i've seen pictures--i can't).
humans seem to have a perverse proficiency to ignore in themselves everything they like best to complain about in others. it's someone's HOME, for crissakes. if they keep a rambunctious dog, we should be happy for them that they are living as they best please. we have our own homes in which to be free of such. if folks maintain odd customs about baksheesh or gender roles where they live, we have to take for ourselves a HUGE deep breath, and acknowledge that, at some point, our business ends where their border begins. sure, sure, apartheid was wrong and we were right to do something about that, but i really like the approach that was taken. "if you don't keep that black/white dog off your sofa, i'm sorry but i can't come over".
the best life changes and the ones that stick best are the ones that we come around to making for ourselves. isn't it reasonable to expect that it's the same for others?
in the meantime, i'll keep looking for ways in which my own proverbial dog(s) can be indulged on my own rhetorical couch, which, i think, is best accomplished by making a point of hanging out with an indulgent and understanding group of playmates whenever possible. things are always a mess around here, ya know? especially that dog over there on the davenport.
in the larger sense, i've often had occasion to listen to complaints (that's what criticisms are) about some people i know by other people i know, and it's funniest because, often, they're bi-directional and comically coincident. (ever notice that your best asshole friend always thinks your other best asshole friend is an asshole friend, and vice versa?) takes one to know one, i always think to myself, and i do my best never to pile on and ratchet up the rhetoric. love me, love my friend, ya know? actually, love everyone. i think some guy a few years back tried to say something to that effect...
anyway, so it is that i find geopolitical posturing these days to be an absolute hoot. (anybody else read the wikileaks cables like scripts from an snl skit?). we wave our nuclear weapons around like the big stick they are, yet we whine incessantly whenever anybody else wants to build some of their own. other countries sail whaling fleets around the globe eradicating whole species of cetaceans while bleating about global disrespect for the environment. still others drop white phosphorous munitions on civilians while railing against the evils of terrorism. (yeah, i know, i should get off that one, but, seriously, i've seen pictures--i can't).
humans seem to have a perverse proficiency to ignore in themselves everything they like best to complain about in others. it's someone's HOME, for crissakes. if they keep a rambunctious dog, we should be happy for them that they are living as they best please. we have our own homes in which to be free of such. if folks maintain odd customs about baksheesh or gender roles where they live, we have to take for ourselves a HUGE deep breath, and acknowledge that, at some point, our business ends where their border begins. sure, sure, apartheid was wrong and we were right to do something about that, but i really like the approach that was taken. "if you don't keep that black/white dog off your sofa, i'm sorry but i can't come over".
the best life changes and the ones that stick best are the ones that we come around to making for ourselves. isn't it reasonable to expect that it's the same for others?
in the meantime, i'll keep looking for ways in which my own proverbial dog(s) can be indulged on my own rhetorical couch, which, i think, is best accomplished by making a point of hanging out with an indulgent and understanding group of playmates whenever possible. things are always a mess around here, ya know? especially that dog over there on the davenport.
posted by kad barma at 8:22 AM
1 Comments:
I side STRONGLY here with the dog owners/hosts. I know I write sometimes about "If Life Had a Rulebook..."
If I ever had the chance to write it, one of the first rules would be, "Never criticize someone who is doing you a favor, as they're doing it."
Having someone into your home may be stretching the term "favor" but the general idea is something like this -- if A gives B a ride home, B loses all rights to criticize the way A drives, the cleanliness of the car, the route, etc.
If A cooks dinner for B, then B could at the very least offer some gratitude. Failing that, B had BETTER not start in about how the vegetables weren't spicy enough, the bread not soft enough, etc.
The hypotheticals could go on all day, but the point remains...don't crap all over someone who is doing something for you, even if that just means an invitation into his/her home.
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